toddler battles

Don't let this face fool you...

We are having a stand off right now over ONE bite of soup. I am going to just scream into my pillow I am so frustrated. Boy thinks he rules this house and can do/say/act however he wants. He gets disciplined but wont sit in time out, wont follow reward charts, won't do what he is told ever. He says no on everything, just to say no. I cant ask him to do something he wants to do- but if I ask him to listen all bets are off. 

He refuses to eat anything I make for dinner. He gets his own meal every night and I am so sick of it. I am raising him to be spoiled and selfish. He knows he can just scream and fight and eventually get his way. 

The problem is he has stamina. He will fight for HOURS on something. I have never "won" a battle with him because we fight for so long and then life happens and its time to leave the house, I have a meeting, somewhere to be, something to do, or its 2 hours past bedtime. I have never been able to just stick it out- therefore he knows if he fights long enough and screams loud enough he will get his way. 

I feel so trapped by parenting this toddler man child. Our neighbors just listen to the tantrums and screaming timeouts locked in the garage (I don't have anywhere else to put him and I would have to psychically hold him in a timeout chair or spot so hard he would have bruises) 

He is starting to manipulate us. I have to gain control. I have tried everything under the sun- rewards, praise, charts, games, timeouts, taking things away, grounding, flick on the cheek (when he screams NO at me) I have even done a bit of love and logic that everyone swears by. He literally doesn't care.

But get this- he is PERFECT for everyone but his parents. No one has issues, he listens, he helps. He isnt a BAD kid, he is actually pretty darn great. He just knows he has our number and uses it against us. 

I am just SO frustrated tonight, needed to vent. I am in for a long one, I am sure he won't sleep much due to being hungry. He has to take the dreaded bite of soup in the morning before he can have breakfast. If he doesn't eat breakfast he can't go to school.... you see the cycle here.... and I have a pretty big day planned for work already. 

But I have to stick to my guns, I have to be the head of this house, not my three year old.

Ryan, I promise this is for your own good. I love you and you will understand eventually and probably thank me for not letting you grow up to be spoiled rotten. 

xoxo,

Mom