With Ryan it has always a balancing act- too much or too little. When he was a baby it was am I holding him too much or not enough, nursing him too much or not enough, am I spoiling him or depriving him of the thing he needs like the most. And everyone had an opinion on what I was doing.
Now the balance is different- its all about structure and discipline. I come from a generation of roaming children. We dont coop them up in pack n plays when we have to answer the phone or use the bathroom. We childproof and baby gate the doors. They have free range of most of the house and can come and go as they please- they are free spirited. I loved that about Ryan. I loved that my house is safe enough to roam and chill where he wanted.
I never wanted to be the mom that spent all day saying NO. I didnt want to nor was able to have one hand on him at all times. There are times where my mom point blank asks me "well why was he allowed to dump the box of crayons out?" Its not that he is ALLOWED to but I had to get a glass of water! I dont have the energy to pick up my 2 year old and carrying him where ever I need to go and then hold him down so he stays next to me at all times. Its not going to happen. But I find myself having to say no, alot. As in should be saying it over and over all day long. Ryan doesnt sit still, ever. There is a reason he does his biz when hes sleeping! Its the only time he is still and relaxed long enough to let things go. Since he could roll he has been on a mission- never aimlessly wandering. Always headed somewhere to do something specific. He does not stop.
So here we are- he is big, opinionated, and stubborn as hell. He doesnt learn the easy way. He has to fall, get hurt, lose something, or whatever to figure things out. He has never responded well to discipline. I say NO over and over and over praying it sticks on the tenth time. I understand a big part of that is being a toddler and most kids are that way but I swear we are our own kind of crazy at this house. I guess I am just at a loss. I need to be more consistent in my parenting. Either he can play games on my phone or call daddy or he cant. He can stand on the baseboard heater and yell out the window or he cant. I get SO sick of saying no a thousand times a day that I let a lot of things slide... sometimes. Its horribly confusing for Ryan and there are plenty of days where I want to bang my head against the wall hoping that something will change.
I just need some advice. I dont want to be a Nazi mom with one hand on his shoulder repeating the phrase "no ryan" over and over all day long. I like him learning from natural consequences and having freedom but there comes a point where when mom says no she means it. Like I said before stubborn as hell..... I have no clue.
Oh oh oh! On a totally non related topic I am getting to meet up with some pretty flipping sweet bloggers this weekend at Bloggy Boot Camp. I have been waiting and waiting for this for ever. I think I bought my ticket last year?! Oh my heck I am so excited I probably wont be able to sleep much tonight. You may know some of the lovely ladies I get to rub shoulders with! Mandy, Amy, Chelsea, Melissa, Stephanie, and so so so many more.
Dont forget to vote if its pink or blue for baby #2!
(See that I just rhymed.. oh yes)